Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Popcorn the Stork-

Marriage is lovely. So is Charles. Homework is hard. Sorry you have to do it scholars. I remember having a lot of homework assignments and falling asleep while trying to study. I remember falling asleep a lot while I was trying to pay attention in class. I remember falling asleep during church and on my couch during movie watches in the middle of the day. My sleep void never lightened from black. And now, as I go to bed at 10 pm each night and wake up at 7, I think on all the sleep I didn't get in college. Or after college. Especially not during my mission- exhaustion abounds when you dart around like a raptor all day long and only get 8 hours of sleep each night.

So here I am, getting tons of sleep and wondering, what the heck is going on? Who sleeps this much? People with the sickness. Well friends, it turns out I have it. It's called Sleep Need. Yes, I need sleep. You might also have it. When I was younger, especially at slumber parties, I would try and convince myself otherwise. "Did it ever work?" you ask hopefully. "No," says Kristin, "She was always the first one asleep."

"Did you ever grow out of Sleep Need?" you humbly wonder with raised eyebrows. "No," says Charles, "Sometimes she even goes to sleep at 9 pm and gets up at 7 am. It's never over." The cure? Children. And believe you me, we're working on it. Am I having a baby? Not yet. Doesn't it take a little while to grow those? Shouldn't you get started? Well, if you must know, yes, I should. And I took the first step- I'm sleeping.

Second step? World domination and the having of babies. Thanks for asking.

Sometimes, when you get married, you are using the same amount of dough for two pizzas instead of just one pizza. So the pizzas are smaller. And everyone wants a bigger pizza. So for wedding presents, sometimes you make your friends fantastic presents instead of sending them money. Everyone loves creativity more than money. Right? Right. Hence Popcorn the Stork. He's not done yet, but he will be. What are you talking about? Storks don't eat pizza! Exactly what I'm saying over here.

And now, some random phrases.

1. You have a nice face.
2. Can I please have some chocolate cake with a gnoche cover and fudge filling?
3. Delicate precision in creation is necessary and difficult. And still, necessary.
4. If you need a cigar box for your harmonica, isn't there going to be a lot of extra space?
5. The cubital fossa is the elbow pit
6. How much moss would you need to pad a whole pillow?
7. Withering wandering gazes wither whether or not writhers wonder "Why so withering?"
8. How many toes do you actually need need?
9. Powdered sugar is made up of cornstarch and white sugar.
10. How did that button on my shoe strap break?

No comments: