Maybe it's a tuna? It's not a tuna-

Yes, it is a tuna can having fallen into my sink on its way to the pasta pot. It didn't want to be noodled. I had no idea with what Charles was messing in the sink, and when I finally looked over, I couldn't have been more amused. Ha. Let it be known he got it out before it fell all the way down- thank goodness, and without the aid of a butter knife. Into our pot went pasta, tuna, spaghetti sauce, green beans, and love. Lots of love. It was pretty good. 

Lately I have asked myself when I will grow out of braids. I then tell myself never and end the conversation. Braids are such a great way to keep yo hair out yo face. I have fine hair, so braids give it texture and body. A good braid will keep my creative juices flowing so I don't cut my hair every two months. Ask Sarah, it was once my favorite addiction.

On a different note, tagging commercials has shown me how many lovely infomercials are on tv these days. I am not a fan. 

I am a fan of Goodreads however. I love books and am currently reading four of them. So I finally got on that site and updated my book lists. Turns out I'm more excited about books than you thought. Also, it was the same as when I got onto Pinterest- I couldn't kick myself off. Now I can keep a real list of books I want to and have read. A public list, so people know I read. So people know I read good books and crappy books, just like you other people out in the world. 

Now you know, I'm not a perfect book chooser, but now you can know how I feel about all those books I read. Some I finish, even though I don't enjoy them. I will rate those so you know not to read them. This is my boyfriend Charles. Fishing for tuna. 

Release the Tiger- To those of you:

As I step onto this soapbox, please realize, I am doing so with full consciousness that none who actually should read this will, thereby nullifying all effect this should have on those personages. If you know of anyone who could benefit from reading this, please refer them to this message. 

From a popcorn eater: To those of you coming for the summer to my ward: Welcome. That said, please realize: I am the steward for the feelings of the sisters in my relief society. If you will only be here for four months and aren't impressed with the girls in my ward, sorry. If you decide to go to church for the right reasons, you ought to be ok. That's all I have to say about that. For now. 

Second. I am eating popcorn right now. Deluxe. I have decided I am what Emily calls an amateur popcorn eater. I often forget to chew my popcorn fully and end up choking on it. Often, or in other words, every time. As an amateur, I can only eat deluxe popcorn or I will choke on it. With all the fancy extras, I have to chew the popped corn to full measure and thereby pass over choking on particulates. 

I dream that one day I will be able to eat popcorn free and clear of additives, otherwise known as poporn, thereby becoming an expert popcorn eater. That would mean I also would be receiving the health benefits of eating popcorn. I know there are some. Unfortunately, those health benefits are not included in the the deluxe experience. Just so ya'll know. Also- if the next big thing is popcorn that flosses itself from your teeth crevices, I won't complain. Nope, not me. 

Here are some pictures Mom. See, I look the same. I am also going to an Oakland A's baseball game tonight. Booyah. Can't wait. 

Books don't read me, I read books

I forgot to bring my book on cd- The Shadow Rising; 4th book in the Wheel of Time series- to the car with me yesterday. I remembered it when I got to my car, but didn't want to go back inside to get it. I paid for my laziness with complete and utter boredom on my ride from and to work this morning. There were not as many new songs on the radio as I had estimated. 

I am also currently reading The Death Cure, the third book in the Maze Runner series. This is a shorter book, which I've tried getting from the library for about a year. I just want to finish the series and get on with my life. It's an interesting series.

Another book I am in the middle of is called The Brothers Karamazov by Dostoyevsky. I have been reading it for a couple months. It is such a large book I keep taking breaks from it with other books. I'm cheating on my russian literature with teenie bopper books. 

I never thought I would be the type of person to read multiple books at once.  I could never see the point of such madness. I am now in the middle of reading madness and I like it. It fits my needs and I'm getting lots of reading done. My life is great.

My roomie is getting married and moves out in June. I need a new roomie to share my room. Rent is pretty average- $550 a month. Let me know if you'd like to live with me or if you know of anyone who would like to. It's a 6 mo contract in an apartment in Dublin, CA (by San Francisco). June to Jan. 

I got kicked in the ankle at soccer Wednesday. Serves me right for being awesome at soccer. I have tried elevating and icing it, but it's such a pain in the foot. It's just puffy. When I get a huge bruise I'll post a pic.

Ode to Candy

During the blitzkrieg, I mentioned, but not to full justice, Chris and Andy. 

Chris is a great guy. I've known him a long time but had never really talked to him until the blitzkrieg. Our date included, but was not limited to, after church fajitas, jokes, and talking. We talked in english for a while and he is a hilarious guy. We sat inside, we sat outside. He talked, I talked. It was a lovely experience. 

Andy came with me to my sister's and we played some games. Andy likes to hug. He often tells me how great I am and expresses his appreciation for me. He is currently serving a service mission for the church. That means he gets lots of time in the temple, helping people, and actively bringing others to Christ. He is an excellent example to me. 

Thank you Andy and Chris. For being great dates. 

Ok, listen here. I watched the first episode for Ready for Love. It will be an interesting step-show to the Bachelor. There seemed to be some good ideas, but in the first episode there were lots of people and things going on. I hope they figure it out as they go, since it looks like it could go someplace. 

My sister Sarah agrees. She has similar taste in shows as me. I like hearing her suggestions for tv, movies, and books. We are entertained by the same things. I love my sister. I have lots of lovely friends and family. I'm pretty lucky. Happy Sibling Day yesterday to my sibs and pseudosibs. 

As a final note, I would like to write a poem to candy. The real sugar stuff. 

Candy I like you.

I would totally bike you.

Hopefully it would not be hot.

If it were, you would melt into a puddle spot. 

You would still be delicious and sticky.

My fingers and face would get totally icky.

I would need a wipe.

Or my face would look totally ripe.

Charles, Kermit wants his voice back.

Now, to get back on track,

Chocolate is the best kind of candy.

Rich chocolate eating away home grown enamel.

Either way, I would never feed it to a camel.

Much too good for children.

Much too good for Mildred(sorry Grandma).

It's just too bad, because I likey.

Crikey.  

Frogs most definitely live in trees

Can you call a lawn mower a time machine? I'm growing a radish. On my face. In a world crisis, I would be in luck. As I am now, not in world crisis, not in luck. Out with the new radish planter. Not cool.

My roomie is engaged. I was therefore thinking about wedding announcements and fancy ways to announce you are getting married. I decided a good way to declare your event would be to say, instead of your parents, Chuck Norris is announcing your nuptuals. Could there be any better way? I submit that there could not. 

Candy. I have lots of gross candy sitting on my desk at work. How do I get all this gross candy? People give it to me. I do not buy it. Nor do I buy poor people candy..often. Greg would say the following are poor people candy: circus peanuts, chocolate covered cherries, andes mints, and other candies I can't remember. So I have: a ring pop, suckers, m&ms, and nabisco honey made snacks = a very strange compilation. 

Robot power

Looking away a little too fast. Passing people. Certain people, nobody at all really. I've gotten lazier in my interaction with others. If I don't want to talk, I just don't look anyone in the face for long. Happens in the subway, on the street, in public restrooms, and in airports. I need to work on that. More eye contact. 

I like beans. I like smoothies. I don't think I'd like a bean smoothie, but who knows. I mean, honestly, who could predict apples, spinach, orange juice, berries, and yogurt together could be so delicious? It pleasantly surprises me every time I ingest the combo. Beans are vegetables. Carrots and spinach are also vegetables. Juiiiiiice. See. I will let you know how it works out. 

The weather in Utah Tuesday and Wednesday was beautiful. I went to attend the wedding of my friend Emily. Not only did I visit with Emily and her wonderful family, I also saw some friends and family of my own. It was lovely. I wore my mission shoes, which aren't stunning, but I walked around a lot and they're comfortable so I didn't regret bringing only them. 

I lived with Emily's family for a couple months and her dad brought some jewelry he thought I'd left there. What a great guy! Focusing on me when they had a whole wedding to plan. It wasn't my jewelry, but he told me to keep it anyway. Those at my table distributed some fancy chains, Aztec art, and some bead necklaces. 

Emily, strangely enough, did not want to wear any of the accessories with her wedding dress. She was wearing her grandmother's necklace. It was gorgeous. Pearls and diamonds. That's the way to go. Her dress was beautiful and her eyes glittered with happiness. She was pleased as punch. Love does that sometimes, it punches you in the face. So it did, and she looked great.

At times I get angry with people in commercials. Sometimes big people, sometimes children. It may be when I see the commercial multiple times, I feel more potent commercial anger. The more obnoxious the commercial, the more anxious I feel when watching the commercials.  This is why I appreciate funny commercials. If I am going to have to watch it over and over and over again, it ought to tickle my fancy. Everyone hates being tickled too much. Fact. 

I would add for English practice: "Computers are sometimes designed faultily," she said with a picture sitting behind her computer trashcan. 

Placenta- Baby Food

First off, some people eat afterbirth, but it's not going to happen at my house. Not unless it's really healthy and goes well in enchiladas. Ladies, I'm having an after baby enchilada party, want to come? I mean, yeah, this giant ball of nutrients has been with me for a long time, let's send those nutrients off right.  We'll do it together. I'm not having any babies yet, but you gotta make plans about important future stuff like that.

It's possible I am the only person that thinks opening lockers sound like velociraptors.  Who doesn't think about dinosaurs when opening their locker? Just saying, the next time you go to the gym, pay attention. You could learn something useful. Like what I just told you. 

I found out, yesterday, when you follow someone's blog, you get emails when they update. I had no idea. I thought it was more useless- such as liking someone's comment on Facebook and clicking the button. Now I know the purpose of following blogs, I will be more likely to do that. You are welcome to follow me too, just not for real. I'd also like to say hello to the 11 people in Russia checking my blog. Hello. From America, the country, not my sister who informed me about blog following. 

As an aside, I like Kelly (Kelly and Michael) and Ellen from tv too. They are terribly interesting and likable. Unfortunately, I don't know them, yet. It will happen. Someday. Also, a shout out to Cheryl who just had surgery and Cheryl in Missouri, both whom I love. And to Bonnie, for being a great sister even if I am a crazy sister sometimes. 

I'd like to reflect on habits. I have some. Good ones, like showering, brushing and flossing my teeth, writing in my journal. Bad ones, like eating the same food for weeks until I can't look at it anymore. And totally weird ones, like having to visit the bathroom when I get to work.  It must be some kind of psychological productivity theory. I don't know if it works, but it certainly annoys me to be on such a defined schedule. 

Yet my schedule never wavers. I like scheduled activities and habits. It's hard for me to jump out of my deeply rutted path. I try to hop out sometimes, and seem to fall back into the ruts. Like eating sandwiches and burritos for lunch. Today I dipped a hard bagel in water. Why did I do that? I thought since it had gotten hard in a paper sack, water logged in a plastic sack it could be a bagel again. Just so you know, I just poked my bagel and it worked. Next week, I'm going to try branching out into real food. Never worked for long before, but I can make new habits. I have probably a billion tamales in my freezer. I should steam those and eat them. Mexican food= happiness. 

Let's talk about television. I've skirted this topic before, but I work in tv. I watch lots. I watch lots of commercials. I watch lots of commercials for shows about killers. I will make you a list. Everybody loves lists. * are for creepiness/less likelihood I would let my kids watch them. I would maybe let my 13 year old watch everything with two stars.

1. Bates Motel ****

2. Cult*****

3. NCIS**

4. NCIS: LA**

5. Criminal Minds****

6. Pretty Little Liars**

7. The Mentalist**

8. Bones**

9. Castle**

10. Body of Proof***

11. Grimm***

12. CSI**

13. CSI: NY**

14. Elementary***

15. Blue Bloods***

16. Law and Order***

17. Law and Order: SVU****

18. Hannibal*****

19. The Following*****

20. Deception***

21. Revenge***

I know, I don't have a 13 yr old, but seeing how much violence and creepiness is on tv makes me less likely to even have tv when I get to that point. Watching all these shows has really shown me the importance of balance. I think watching more family centered shows, or sitcoms would be better for my underlying current. You know, the good vibes current we have inside our homes and selves.

Honestly, I know sex and violence sell, but I shouldn't trade peace for the momentary entertainment it may bring to my life.  Getting inside the minds of killers takes the Spirit away from me because we cannot have good and evil inside us at the same time. So, I am going to make a more concentrated effort to watch good things and avoid things that creep me out. That's why I don't watch the news, so I don't know why I would watch fiction that shows the same stuff. That said, I want to see Vikings and The Bible on the History channel.

BTW, this is not a lecture for people who like murder mysteries, since I certainly have an affinity for watching them. It's more a rant about tv and a decision on my part to watch less violence (eat less chocolate) and read more books (eat more brussel sprouts and chicken). Next week, stop watching sexy shows ie. Scandal (guilty pleasure). It's hard enough for me, who has perspective, to keep on track. 

"The difficulties faced by gospel teachers—parents or those called or employed—are magnified by the modern technology to which their young students have instant access. As Sister Julie B. Beck, former Relief Society general president, described a few years ago: “There are mediamessages everywhere that are antifamily, and our young people are very connected with media. … Increasingly, our youth are seeing no reason to form a family or get married in spite of all the teaching you give them. They are being desensitized about the need to form eternal families.”5

I will speak about some of these antifamily messages and suggest some things we can teach to counteract them. In the context of your sequential scripture teaching, you are responsible to teach the basic doctrine of marriage and the family. My message is intended to help you in that effort. I seek to add to the remarkable, heaven-inspired recent outpouring of helps to strengthen our young members’ role in hastening the work of the Lord in these last days." Dallin H. Oaks; As He Thinketh in His Heart; CES Devotional; lds.org.

I have some fears. I am not talking about the inexplicable intense fear I feel when a police car is in my vicinity. That's a different kind of irrational fear. I'm talking about fear of the future. Everyone does. The catch: I also have confidence and faith in the future. Hope helps me get through my doubts and insecurities. That said, I also have an amazing boyfriend who supports me through all my craziness. I am really lucky to have him in my life. #Charlesisthegreatest

Going to the temple in Oakland helps me with perspective. I get to go three times this week because of friends and significant events in their lives. This is why my life is so great, because I can shove past the fears and think about velociraptors. Thank goodness crocodiles ate all the dangerous dinosaurs. That's why they're my favorite animal. Amen.